These past two weeks were one big whirlwind. I got a new job, as a girl friday for an outsourcing company. I ate nothing but stress and fast meals from a bowl, whatever I could find in the kitchen to heap on inside it, that's what I'll eat. All this craziness these past weeks. For two weeks in a row, I had worked on Sundays. For two weeks in a row, I worked for 8 to 12 hours straight. Finally, last Sunday, I decided to give my past clients to Krish, the lovely lady whose assistance in my ragtag team had been crucial.
For those of you who may not know, Kuya Elim, especially, since you asked about it, I've been an online worker since 2006. I started out writing essays for lazy American students; then when I realized that it really wasn't ethical (after I bought a new hard drive, a couple of cellphones, and other stuff besides ), I dropped the job and decided to try and focus on my studies.
When the reality set in: that I would need to find something to support the DSL bills, I then started to send out my resumes to job postings I found on http://www.bestjobs.ph. On a miraculous turn of events, my official online career began with working for a Philippine Internet Marketing expert, after an interview on yahoo messenger that lasted all of 2 hours.
My career progressed: from him alone, over the summer of 2007, the year I graduated, I had been able to find work with other people. From Mr. Local Internet Marketer, I had a Philippine blog overlord, an American blog CEO, and a bidding site/outsourcing diva for clients. Juggling them all in my hands, I almost never got anywhere. Sure I got paid good money. Sometimes I got more than I asked for, but there started a nagging feeling in my heart that this was all slavery.
It was, of course, a crazy lie that I had bought. I realize now when I talked to a Philippine Internet Marketing diva, who also is a churchmate of mine, that I had bought into the employee mentality that told me that I should try to break free of the system.
Robert Kiyosaki advised, in his book Rich Dad, Poor Dad, that even when a person works the 9 to 5, he or she should plumb her savings into a passive income account...
With this, he went on to expound that an employee should work for himself. Even as an employee, he should be plumbing his money into investments, not to live on paycheck to paycheck. When you have a goal bigger than your bills, it's easier to drive yourself to get there, according to him.
But I had not bumped into Robert Kiyosaki until September of 2008, when I saw one of his books lying around here in this house that I stay in.. I read it, almost through to the end, and I realized that I should no longer feel like a slave. I should realize that I should work my butt off with my main client in order to build that nest egg for myself.
In September, I was a good girl. I was faithful to my main employer and tried to reach targets. But October became a test in character and time management skills, when temptation after temptation kicked in.
I was offered a lucrative and prestigious package when a local surveillance company wanted me to work for them as their outsourced writer.
BIG MISTAKE.
While I love the manager I worked with as a person, working with her was HELL. My close friend and partner in one of my yet-to-take-off ventures once said: the manager and I could have been great friends had we not have had to work with each other... And indeed, it was a turbulent relationship. I was plugging in at least 8 hours a day just chatting and fighting with her, over that stupid project.
After that stretch of time, October to December, I have only this to show for it: for a sliver of time, my house bills were "updated": no debts on my house bills. But only for that split second.
October to November was hell. I was juggling several clients at once, but I was getting nowhere. Money was pouring into everyone else's pockets but mine. Why? Coz I was so friggin needy and kept chatting with my biz partner and friend.
Yeah, that and the fact that admin work and fighting with the manager sapped me dry.
I have to finally admit to myself that I had one big F in the stretch from October to December. I was constantly shielding myself from my parents that I was working hard. Yeah, when everyone else finally went to sleep.
I was reaching some targets, but I was growing more and more exhausted by the minute. I was also a big F in one major thing: I was not faithful to my main employer, at all.
The season before that, I identified Multiply as a time-sapper. So I started to blog less and less. I had also realized that chatting was sucking up a lot of time. But working with a friend gave me an excuse to stay on yahoo messenger for so long.
BIG MISTAKE again.
But thanks to this job that I now have, whose shift starts in 3 hours, yikes, I can finally earn my keep in a stable way.
My working is monitored via software, so it gives me the extra discipline. I no longer chat during office hours, except for those moments when there are running tasks that are not attention-intensive. It's a better system, too, because I can get up to get food, text for a split second, and I don't need to stop my timer, because my workplace's system takes care of my attendance.
From September to December 2008, I was the boss of me. I bought into the lie that to be financially liquid, I should get more projects. I bought into the lie that prosperity comes with getting more work, with being your own boss.
Today, I realize that prosperity comes when you honor God and be faithful. Psalm 37. That includes not taking on too many sidelines, and taking care of your sanity.
I had a long career in 3 years.
From essay company to Internet Marketer, blogging kingpins, two outsourcing bidding marketplace divas, a community site developer, a social networking fledgling, a savvy Internet Marketing/blogging/marketing hybrid that got me my 15 milliseconds of fame, a travel networking magnate, a self-help non-guru who had studied under Anthony "Tony" Robbins, who was featured on Shallow Hal (the guy who hypnotized Hal), a local surveillance magnate and his hellish manager, and who knows if I have others I forgot, haha!
Oh yeah, my short stint with another outsourcing/SEO article company before I went for the essay writing company. And oh, that essay writing website, as well.
Who knows what else I've worked on? My foggy brain could only recall the lessons learned, the pain that the lessons came with, in order to brand my soul never to do the mistakes again, and the realization that God is a good Father: He allows all these things in our lives in order to prime us for the next level.
Without all these experiences, I would have been incapable of handling what I have now. It takes a lot of trust to put your business in the hands of a girl whom you talk with only on Skype or Yahoo Messenger. It takes a lot of trust to open your records and everything else to another person.
Some other people got screwed over by employees they work with in real life, where they could whap! these people on the head for realz. Thankfully, the treacherous side of the human heart only reared its head in me once, and it was the single, most painful moment I've had in my career. Thanks to that, I can now assure myself and my employer that I am trustworthy, and I won't screw him over. I prefer peace of mind, thank you.
But I have to admit that sometime since last week, looking at Php 15,000 a month, I had panicked, because my employer's daily mantra was "move to Windows," and there's no way that I could get a decent laptop on Php 5,000. I have to live on something too, you know? And I have to tithe too. Pay taxes. Pay debts. Things a person does to keep from being robbed by satan.
With that panic, I had already considered getting a credit card and getting a loan to start a business. Ants in the pants, really.
But then God reminded me to rest. So I did. After two weeks of working Sundays, there's no way that anyone would rob me of my Sabbaths again, unless I get stupid once more. Yes, when hell freezes over shall I work all through Sunday. I hope God facilitates that, as well.
I also got reminded that if I borrowed money to make money, I would be feeding on a lie that the world has put forth. And I hadn't even finished setting up www.nenyalorien.com just yet. I had not monetized it, nor even put up the things I needed to put up to make me some money that could be had, just keeping that site lying around. Why did I have to think about digging a deeper ditch by buying into the stupidity of investing, the world's way?
I have deep respect for my friends who could make money out of borrowed money. But I also have deep respect for God's telling Moses: "What's that in your hand?"
Yes, I shall work with what I have: an Internet connection, a brain, and a couple of domains lying around.
When I am faithful, I am sure God will reward me with more.
Lord, I'm sorry for allowing my heart to be stolen by love of money, yet again. Please keep on rescuing me from myself.
Somewhere in Proverbs, it says that easy "money gets lost quickly, but money that is gathered little by little turns ito great wealth" (paraphrased). And so it shall be. No loans, no credit cards for me. If you have an old laptop you want to sell me for installment starting March, or if you have a laptop you are willing to give away for a prayer and a blessing, I'm here. :)
And on the note of workaholism: I could also listen to Dave Ramsey, when he says that if you are in debt, you could take an extra job to get out of it quickly.
Naaaaaaaah. Not yet. Let my brain settle from the blenderized bits that are swimming in my skull. If I get an article order or two, yay. If not, whatever, I won't die.
But what I seriously want is to start writing my own books again.
No more do I want to see my own work, something I am passionate about, sold back to me:
http://www.20daypersuasion.com/WSOpsych.htm
No more, please. I'm tired of prostituting what is, to a writer, his or her babies. I am happy with writing stray articles for others. I am even happy writing a weight loss ebook. Coz I'm still fat anyway, and those ideas work well only if I applied them to myself. Haha. But for things like that book in the link above, stuff I am passionate about: inner healing, psychology, etc., it breaks my heart that I now have to buy that for myself, in order to resell that and slap my name on it.
Money, if only I didn't need you to buy my new Macbook Pro, which God has already promised me. If only I didn't need you to keep staying in this home that I've learned to love. If only I didn't need you to get from here to my church. If only I didn't need you to keep fed tomorrow... I won't be working this hard.
Yes, I shall agree with Robert Kiyosaki that I would be using the money I earn from working to set up a business. No, I shall not agree with his adherents, the guys who are behind a certain abundance movement in the Philippines, that it takes borrowed money to make money. No! No! No! I shall prosper, God's way, and in God's Time!
Lorie's Heart, you better listen to that!
Let's be wise with where we invest money, and how to go about it. I will not run myself down and shred myself in order to chase the elusive buck. I shall do this, God's way.
***
As a final word, to answer your question, Kuya Elim, I am:
- A Writer.
- A Virtual Assistant.
- I do Search Engine Optimization (stabilized one website at #1, thanks to my efforts and my former employer's tactics).
- I can create websites, but not from code, not yet anyway.
- I can do almost everything on a computer except program and create formulas on Excel.
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